Forget going it alone as a new mum. Also, forget skulking about in online forums — the noughties called, they want their keyboard warriors back. Although we do concede the 4am night feed Facebook group is a worthy hang out in the small hours. The truth is, you’ve got a baby, so you need mum friends IRL (In Real Life). These are a couple of reasons why it’s absolutely worth having fellow mums on your side:
You might be ahead of your peer group. We know you’ve already got loads of friends but if you’re not all having kids around the same time, it can be tough having them empathise. Plus, mum friends will actually want to join you for a play date.
Parenting can be lonely. It can feel like your anchored to the spot to begin with and leaving the house with a newborn seems like a daunting task. However, getting out for coffee and a catch up once a week can do wonders for your mental wellbeing. Just make the first step.
Other mums just ‘get it’. Sleepless nights, skin rashes, development milestones, you name it – your mum mates are either in the same boat or a few steps ahead. They can always assure you: yes, you are doing this right.
Someone to have a moan with. Yep, you can vent to your partner but what about when you need to complain about them? Nothing feels better than being able to have a good natter, even if it is at the local crèche.
They know their stuff. Surrounding yourself with friends who’ve done it before gives you access to a fountain of parenting hacks, toileting training tips and much more.
Fellow mums don’t judge. Sometimes you just need someone you can open up to, whether it’s about baby blues, feeling a bit sore down there or a kid who will not stop crying, other mums will stand by and listen to you.
How do you make friends though?
As with most modern problems, there’s an app that can solve that one… Say hello to Peanut. While the dating scene may be far behind you, get your ‘right swipe’ game ready for Peanut, the matchmaking app for mums. Swipe up to wave at another mum and decide whether to match with them based on shared interests, whether they work full-time and find what they’re after (no, not romantically. Think play dates, mum and baby fitness etc.). We know it sounds nerve-racking, but we’re also part of a generation who can’t approach someone in a coffee shop without worrying it’s creepy.